Thursday, August 4, 2011
It's OK to Talk about You
People are wounded; it’s a fact of our fallen lives. These wounds affect most everything in our lives—from our choice of work to how we communicate, much of it involves either healing or avoiding what hurts us. One of things that it most affects is our relationships, especially how vulnerable we feel we can be. Most of us, after being hurt by someone we love, grow up guarded and thinking we cannot trust certain groups of people. Sometimes we feel as though we cannot trust anyone. We feel we are all alone. Other times we grow up believing that no one wants to hear what we think, or that to express our feelings is week, arrogant, or inconveniencing to others. Often we just think that Jesus is the only one who we should ever take our wounds to. Indeed, he is the Divine healer. He alone will understand fully.
I want every person reading this to hear me and understand—it is OK (in fact many times it is NECESSARY) to go other people (human people who have the capability of hurting you further) with your problems. It is not burdensome, it is not arrogant, and it does not diminish the merit or penance of your suffering. It does, in fact, allow the other person to exercise love, empathy, compassion, and service. Your suffering, if you allow it, can help make others holy as well.
Humans are relational creatures, we exemplify the Trinity in that we are made to give AND receive love. How can you expect others to love you if you don’t 1) love them and 2) ALLOW them to love you? Some people feel loved when you trust them with your problems. Some people ASK you if they can help you, making it clear that it would be no burden, but an exercise of love, to just listen to your hardships. And yet, you deny them the chance to love you.
Yes, we all need to guard our hearts in the appropriate manner, but we also must dare to be vulnerable in the appropriate manner as well. I challenge you all, as well as myself, to not be afraid to accept love. Yes, you will probably be hurt again; unfortunately, humans do that to each other. But you will also likely find a love that will transform your life. I dare you to love.